Collisions & Caffeine

A little over a month ago I was driving to pick up my daughter from the babysitter.  I was running a little bit early and knew that the sitter wouldn’t be at her house because she was picking up her children from school.  I was at a stop light trying to figure out what I should do to pass the few minutes of time when it hit me…Starbucks!  I whipped out my phone to find the closest purveyor of caffeine.  I found one on the little map and began the short journey.

At least, on the map it seemed short.

I drove by the location it was supposed to be and didn’t see it.  I circled around, and again didn’t see it.  I tried again, and no luck. 

Where is this Starbucks?!?!?

 I was getting a little frustrated (I know, it is hard to believe) at this point because it wasn’t the easiest road to find a place to turn around and get back on the road easily.  I was passing by for my last try and I was sitting at the stop light, stewing a bit.  I happened to look over at the oncoming traffic (noticing that not one of them had coffee) when I observed a sudden stop by a truck beside me.  No big deal, someone just made a quick stop, the driver of the truck saw it and stopped in plenty of time.

The car behind him did not.

There was a small sedan cruising along at a nice clip that somehow missed the stopping of the truck and at the last moment saw that traffic had stop and swerved to miss the truck.  Did I mention I was right beside the truck?  I look up and see this car coming in my direction, there is no time to do much of anything, except continue to look at the rapidly approaching car. 

WHAM!

Somehow, the speeding car catches the back bumper of the truck.  The truck has minor damage, somehow the car looks like it ran into a wall, and the truck wasn’t even a Chevy (like a rock and all, you know.)  Random scraps spray into the air and pelt my little, old car.  I am unscathed, shaken a bit, but all was well.

However, I didn’t really care about Starbucks anymore.

I have coffee at home, after all.

There are a lot of things that go on in life, and for me, I always want to look for the next big thing that God wants to do.  I want to be a part of it, I want to be involved, and if I am honest…I want to be the guy that God chooses to lead it.  So I search with hunger and a near one track mind to see where it is and what it is.  Meanwhile, people are having accidents all around me and their lives are being filled with various trials and struggles.  Their lives are slamming into each other and there are pieces of their life that spatter my life. 

Do I just drive away, thankful that I am unscathed by their tragedy?  Their trials?  Their “stuff?”

Many times I think Christians (generally speaking) are so worked up about being with other believers, protecting the church, assimilating people into people like us, and searching for “Heaven on earth” that we forget that there is life going on all around us.  It isn’t that these things are bad, or shouldn’t be a priority in our life…but do we have the attitude…

“To Hell with you I am looking for Heaven?”

I am not suggesting it is intentional.  I am not suggesting we give up looking for God in the ways I listed above.  I am just suggesting that we look for ways to care, love, and show grace to others intentionally. 

Here is what I think happens when we do…

The search for “Starbucks”, that is, the thing we think we want from God, or the thing we think He should want for us, takes a back seat.  The things that matter to God (people, the lost “sheep”, the poor, prisoner, blind, oppressed) become more real to us, and they begin to matter more to us than the search.  In that we end up finding the thing we were searching for.  

God will reveal His plans to us, and His revealing is not based on how hard we search...but how zealously we truly and actively care about the things that matter to Him.  The Pharisee's were very knowledgeable of God's Word, but they had no love or compassion. 

I was looking for Starbucks, not a car accident.  Are we looking for Heaven and avoiding (intentionally or not) the very people that we are to be loving on and representing Heaven to?  As we love the ones we are sent to, especially in the times of their collisions, Heaven reveals itself.  God opens our eyes and shows us the very thing we were searching for.  We were just searching for it in the wrong place. 

                

Thank You for Your grace.

Buried

           Life has gotten quite busy for us recently.  Our home has become a proverbial race track.  Up in the morning, moving kids around, getting to work, working, coming home, making dinner, going to dance class or back to work, taking care of the normal house things, and the unforeseen matters.  For example, last night I went to do something very routine on my car…

...it took two hours…

…confirming that I am NOT (nor ever will be) a mechanic.

If I told you I was not frustrated last night, would you believe me?

Neither would I.

It is a season in life.  I am ok with that, but I have felt that I was in a dry season spiritually.  I understand that it is ok to have dry seasons in life.  However, I had to wonder, when was it going to end?  I found myself with some small pockets of free time here and there.  When I found these pockets, all I wanted to do was to be a vegetable and relax.  The problem is that I was feeling a longing, not guilt, but a longing to be in a place similar to where I was when I had some of my closer times with God.

I don’t want to go back to those times, but I want to be close again, but how do I do it when I am buried?

                I began to search my schedule.  I began trying to line up my priorities of God and family with what I was doing.  Does the direction I am heading line up with the destination I am hoping for of being close to God, being a good husband, and being a good father (and numerous other things).  From doing this I realized that things cannot remain this way forever.  I understand that it is just a season, but I want to move forward, realizing that there will be bumps and hiccups due to the matters taking place in this season because I don’t want to set unachievable goals.  Unachievable goals just frustrate me and make me less likely to continue and therefore, finish.

                I started praying.  In all honesty, it wasn’t a lot.  It wasn’t some sit down, hour’s long, weeping, kneeling, and pensive prayer time.  It was every time I thought about it.  I was troubled about it (more than I probably should have been because I over think things).  It came to me, I believe spoken to me, that there was a story in the Scripture that related to this.

                In Matthew 25 there is a story of a wealthy man that gave bags of gold (talents) to some of his workers.  Those who were the good workers took what was given them and made more.  One of the workers buried the money and used the excuse that he was afraid to do much else with it because he didn’t want to lose the wealthy man’s money.

                The story speaks of the sod of the earth as the thing that buries the gold, I began to wonder what is it that I allow to bury me in this life.  What are the meaningless things, in the midst of the important things, that I allow to cover me over and not be useful?  In some cases we will be busy with very important things.  I wanted to be sure to address that possibility.  In my case, in the midst of the important things, God began to reveal some things that I had in my schedule that had a higher priority than necessary.

                This is not an exact science, it is a journey and one that we should try our best to enjoy.  This journey is a gift.  It is the treasure that God has given me to care for.  I don’t want to bury it in dirt, or any other worthless thing.  I want to invest it in things that will bring glory to God, show His love to my family, my friends, and really anyone I come in contact with.  My Intentions may be great, but is the way I am living my life pointing me in the direction of that goal?  Or do I continue to intend to do well, but nothing about my life changes.

                Once again, this is not an exact science.  However, it is an important matter (that I have found personally) if we want to be the people that accomplish the life that God has set for us.  If we want to be the best parent we can, the best spouse, the disciple, the friend, co-worker or whatever.

Don’t get buried.  Your life is a treasure and should be lived as such.  Let the things of less worth go and chase after the important things that will add to this treasure that has been entrusted to your care. 

Story: Restored Connection (pt7)

(What you are about to read is a selection from a retreat I spoke about a year ago.  It is a continuation from Part 1 (The Dawn of Creation), Part 2 (The Separation) ,  Part 3 (The Desperation), Part 4 (The Ability to Connect),  Part 5 (The Reconnect), and Part 6 (the Deeper Connection). It is based on the discussion of our connection with God and comes from Galatians 5)

This connection comes from our understanding our brokenness, understanding the crisis that we come to without God’s Spirit working in us. Seeking a trip to Heaven as the total Christian experience is shallow and ineffective. It is unfulfilling, unfruitful, and disheartening. There is no power in a Christian life that has no connection. When we come to a place of understanding how ineffective it is for us to try to live this Christian life on our own abilities, the better. 

However, what does a life look like that is connected, a life that understands…truly understands, God is doing the work through us? This is where we see the power, the change, and the true connection. This is where we see victory; this is where we find the beauty in God’s plan because He reveals it to us. He reveals it to us, because we understand He must do it. This is where we begin to learn and see how powerful trusting God is, this is the place where we see faith come alive and realize there is so much depth to what faith is. This is where we see a glimpse of the life that God wants for us.

This connected lifestyle is where we feel the presence of God surrounding us, and even though we go through tough times, we truly feel that He is there; because He is, but now we experience it. This is the place where your relationship with God is not just positional but experiential, this is the place where you don’t just call yourself a Christian, you are living with God living through you…you experience Him in your life. With this is great power.

Imagine approximately one hundred and twenty people experiencing this power, which is the number of followers Christ left behind, and from that the world has known of Christ for centuries. What could He do with thirty people in our area? I don’t want to become cliché, but what if thirty peoples heart broke for what breaks God’s heart? They banded together to be the change? What would that look like? What if we lived our life as a sermon to those around us, not by the neat ideas we could come up with but we lived our lives connected to God’s Spirit and let Him live the life through us? 

What would a group believers look like that came together realizing, I mean really realizing, that if God wanted to, He could change the world through them. Do you believe that? The world? Nothing is impossible with God. What if we were hungry for that? I imagine, a group of students that had this hungry, God led desire, could do so much damage to mediocrity and all that the enemy tries to attack us with that we would see lives changed by the hundreds, dare I say thousands? Millions? Who knows, but do we really believe that God, through a connected life could do that?

I have resolved to do continually work towards this connection. I believe God can take me, and all my mess, and blow my mind as I continually seek to be connected and live my life given to Him. I believe that is what he wants from you. I believe He wants to be connected to you, work through you, for His glory. I believe He would love to blow your mind with all that he has planned for you. I believe He wants you to not live your Christian life by the pre-conceived notions, but He wants you to allow Him to live His life through you. 

I believe In God’s power, and I believe in God’s power through you.

When the connection that God intended to have with mankind is restored in a person’s life, look out, because there is no telling what God might do through them.

That, my friend is so exciting…I don’t have human words for it.

Story: The Deeper Connection (pt.6)

(What you are about to read is a selection from a retreat I spoke about a year ago.  It is a continuation from Part 1 (The Dawn of Creation), Part 2 (The Separation) ,  Part 3 (The Desperation), Part 4 (The Ability to Connect), and Part 5 (The Reconnect). It is based on the discussion of our connection with God and comes from Romans 8:1-17)

Here is where the beauty comes in. Thus far we have been discussing in these chapters, matters that discuss this connection between God and others, but He also wants you. It may not seem that way, but He does. I understand this may all seem somewhat foreign to you, this connection that we have been talking about is still happening. The Spirit of God, the almighty God, the loving Creator, the One who sacrificed of Himself to break the barrier, the One who broke Himself to heal our brokenness.

This is for available for all, but we must realize, it is for us, it is for you…you.

He wants you to want Him. He wants you to want to hear from Him. He wants you to want to connect with Him. There is nothing you can make happen or conjure up, just be open. Realize that He has so much that He wants to share with you. How He feels about you, He wants to direct you in the matters you are confused, He wants to show you so much in His Word, in His creation…by His Spirit. He wants to be with you. Just like I mentioned before, we often make God out to be someone “out there” we may not say that but we feel it. We must ask Him to reveal to us that He is here and now, and realize, despite how we feel that He IS here!

This is contrary to how we communicate in our version of normal. We communicate in ways that are very material and we expect concrete response. When we talk face to face we physically see people, when we text or type on a website we see the letters of response, even if we talk on the phone we hears audibly a physical response. With God, it isn’t physical necessarily, it is spiritual. It may connect with us in an emotional way, in a connection with our conscious, in a motivation, and in ways that are absolutely unexplainable. It is a God thing that we will never fully understand.

That is the beauty of this connection.

How do we do it? How do we connect? I cannot give you an exact answer because it works differently for everyone as we are individuals. I know we must search for Him, and not in a way that is based on how good of a person we are. We must search for Him in a way where the desperation meets a hungry search because we understand in that desperation how depraved and broken we are. If we have no understanding of our brokenness, we risk the ability to connect. Why? Because if we don’t understand how broken we are, we are being prideful in thinking we are doing fine on our own.

God resists that…

…but, God loves a humble person. If we are selfish enough to believe that we don’t really need this connection because we said a prayer so we are going to Heaven and really that is all we care about…we have completely missed it. Heaven is the byproduct of this journey, not the motivation. The motivation is to be reconnected with our Creator and letting Him use us to glorify Himself through us.

Heaven is not the motivation…it is the byproduct, it isn’t the point of a Christian life…it is the outcome. This is a concept that is lost on many of those who call themselves believers. Instead of asking, “If you were to die tonight, would you know where you would go (heaven or hell)?” Maybe we should be asking, “If you knew you had 20 years to live, what life would you live?” Christ said to “Follow Me,” He didn’t say, “Pray this prayer so you can get in!” He wants us to connect, live life with Him, let Him bring us to a place where we can live life to the fullest as He planned for us to.

We let Him have…us. We seek the connection. We long for the chance to glorify Him. We prepare by continually drawing closer to God by letting go of self. This life isn’t about us, it is about connecting to Him because we believe that is His desire and the design He has for us. We let God be our personal God, not just the “out there” God who is punching our get out of hell free cards. Let Him connect; lay your life open before Him. We often try to pull off the “Adam and Eve hiding in the trees” bit, but we have to remember, they were hiding because they had lost the connection.

Over to you…

1. What is the best way for you…you personally…to connect to God

2. What is your biggest hindrance?

3. Are you willing to hear things from God that are scary? That may cause you to have to change things in your life that are important? Are you sure?

Snipping Insecurity

“I lay on the floor listening to my daughter wailing in her crib and thought to myself, I just wish that she felt safe and secure.”

            Arianna recently had a small procedure done to snip her tongue because she was tongue tied a bit and we (my wife and I) felt that there may be some speech issues that would arise from her being tongue tied.  Denise (my wife) scheduled a time for the procedure and we went forward with it.  We never like the thought of our daughter going through something that may cause her any form of discomfort in any way, but we believed (and still do) it is for her best.

            If you know Arianna, you know that she is pretty laid back, funny, almost always walking with a smile on her face, and loves to joke around even at her young age (2).  So we went to Children’s hospital and she was her normal, easy going self.  So much so that the nurses asked us more than once if she was always like this because she was so nonchalant about everything going on.  She recovered quickly, and was ready to go home after the procedure and eat.  

Arianna, as she waits for her procedure at the hospital.

            We came home…and there is a point here, I promise…she ate and went down for a nap.  She slept for quite a while, as expected, and woke up crying.  Actually, it was a bit more of a wail.  Denise checked her temperature and it was a whopping 105.  

Queue the freak out.

We carried out the normal fever reducing measures, and called the doctor.  Nothing to be too alarmed about but keep monitoring as the fever teetered between 99 and 103.  We went to the pediatrician within the next few days and continued our home care, and she slowly began to become less “funky.”  

However, there was…and to a point still is…an issue.  

She was scared to go to sleep.

At least that is what I think.

She went to sleep and woke up and her tongue hurt.

Then she went to sleep and woke up with a fever and felt miserable.

She knew something happened when she went to sleep.

So, going to bed became a fight for the first time in my daughter’s life.  She is the easiest child I know of, so this was so foreign.  We would put her in bed and she would scream and toss and jump and everything a child can do to stay awake and get our attention.  So we tried to teach her the word “safe.”  For some reason, it is very difficult to describe what it means to be safe to a two year old.  

My wife and I held her in her room for a while and laid on the floor with her, then we moved her to her crib as we lay on the floor and this is when she began to cry because she wanted the security of being with us.  

I lay on the floor listening to my daughter wailing in her crib and thought to myself, I just wish that she felt safe and secure.  I wish she knew that she could trust me to protect her.  I wish I could somehow communicate with her.  

And it dawned on me, in the midst of the chaos, the crying, the shrieks of “Daddy!” that this must be very similar to how God feels when I am here crying, screaming, and writhing in the midst of some trial and feeling like He isn’t there or just doesn’t care.  

I have a decent vocabulary of words that I can use, but many of those words (especially those that describe safety) are lost on a two year old version of vocabulary.  How much greater is God’s communication to my limited understanding?

I was within seconds of being in Arianna’s presence when she was in her crib and I was in the other room, but to her, I might as well have been a million miles away because she didn’t see me.  Ever feel that way with God?  

Why won’t you respond?  Maybe He is and we have to trust that He is in His omniscient way.  I could allow my daughter to have everything she wants done her way and I could be her whipped servant, but that isn’t what is best for her.  She doesn’t understand that and gets frustrated with me at times, but, as a father I know what is better for her and am ok with the anger she has towards me because I know it will be what is best for her in the long run.

God is similar, only in a much greater scale.  Do I trust Him though?  Do I rest in the safety of knowing that He has me?  Can I relax and let go of situations that I do not understand?  Or am I the child screaming at Him because I want what I want because I am afraid, hurt, and not understanding what God is doing?  

I hate the fact that my daughter suffered, but I love the fact that she loves me and smiles when I come home and runs to me saying, “Daddy!”  God does too.  Look for the lessons, they seem to be abounding all around.

Story: The Reconnect (Pt.5)

(What you are about to read is a selection from a retreat I spoke about a year ago.  It is a continuation from Part 1 (The Dawn of Creation), Part 2 (The Separation) ,  Part 3 (The Desperation), and Part 4 (The Ability to Connect). It is based on the discussion of our connection with God and comes from Colossians 1:9-23, Acts 2)

Christ made the once for all time sacrifice, there was an understanding that God connected with us. The issue was, now what? He was gone again. What was mankind to do? Those who followed Him most closely forgot that Christ said He would send a Helper and said that we would do greater things than He did. Greater things? How is that possible? There was a time of celebration in Jerusalem (the capital of Israel) and many people came from all over to this celebration. 

Something happened…

Something very big…

God connected with those who believe.

Think about this, since Adam and Eve, man had not had the connection. Christ came and a few people in this world had a connection with God, now…anyone…anyone who believed in Christ could have a connection. You see, when God created mankind he also gave us a spirit. He gave us an inner person, if you will, that guides and directs us for better or worse. The reason everything changed is because, God sent His Spirit to connect with ours. 

This changed everything.

This meant that we could ask God what to do and feel His presence guiding us in our decisions. In times of necessity, God would speak to us and point us to where we should go. As we read His Word, He can help us discern what it is saying. We just need to seek Him and He meets us. This is amazing. If you have ever experienced the presence of His Spirit, how can you describe it? What words can you use? As an example of this major movement of the Spirit, the first movement, God’s Spirit connected with His followers and gave them the ability to speak in many different languages. Remember I said, people came from all over the place to Jerusalem?

They heard the truth of God in their native tongue. Keep in mind, these followers of Christ didn’t speak other languages.

The Spirit spoke through them.

Can you imagine that? Take a minute and picture that.

Seriously.

A disciple gets up and feels as though He must speak out about the truth of Christ, he goes to open his mouth and He begins to speak Chinese or maybe a tribal language from Africa. The astonished look as the first follower spoke must have been priceless. The feeling of speaking in that language, and then doing so with authority, not knowing how this was happening but the words flowing from your mouth with comfort. 

Amazing.

Many came to know Christ, and therefore, become connected to God through His Spirit. What a powerful display of what connection can do. God plugging Himself into the human spirit, connected, energized, glorifying Himself through His creation as we were intended to. It wasn’t the same as the original connection, but what a powerful connection. Reunited and it feel so good. There is power when God connects with us. God gave them the ability, and the beautiful thing is, we have the ability too. The followers prayed and sought Him, when you seek Him, you will find Him and His Spirit will connect you. 

Over to you…

1. Think about it, what can God…plugging Himself into you do?

2. Explain it, as if talking to a non-believer, how does this Holy Spirit thing work?

3. What are your thoughts on connection with God?

Grace, Love, and Murder (pt.2)

(This is a continuation of the post from yesterday.)

Before I go any further, I do not want to make light of the action that Steve carried out.  There are several families that are hurt, broken, mourning, and it is not my intention to make light of the situation.  The hope is that we look at the sickness of sin, examine ourselves to see where God has been gracious to us, and see the areas that we should be growing in grace if we are truly desiring to be more life Christ.

I read some of the comments on Facebook as this story spread to some of my friends, and to others that went to school with Steve.  One comment stuck out to me…

“It is sad, but Steve was always so mean to me in school…”

                In this instance, I was so frustrated with this comment.  I was very close to throwing out a rebuttal that would have surely been overly harsh.  However, I had to be honest with myself, isn’t that my attitude in grace?  

                A sort of, “yeah, he had it comin’” attitude, and I rejoice a little that his life is now (for all intents and purposes) over?  He was mean then, so now it comes as no surprise that this lowlife would do something like this?

               When I was young, a dog bit me and left me with some small scars.  I found out that dog was hit by a car several years later, and to be honest…I was kind of happy.

Why?

Is that grace?  

          I can’t imagine Christ walking this earth and feeling a bit vindicated that someone that had treated him poorly, or wronged Him, or was just a liability to society threw their life away but committing a terrible crime.

 

Would He say there should be punishment?

Yes.

Would He take joy in that?

No.

So why do we?

I believe it is because it makes us feel better about ourselves, more righteous, and in our works based mindset we believe that we are closer to God when we can one-up someone on the good works list.  

Sadly, this has nothing to do with how God has things set up.

The Apostle Paul was a murder.

I say all of that to say this.  God has shown me great grace in my life.  It has been a grace that has been sprinkled throughout this journey of my life and intermittently mixed with some very grace filled events.  For me to be shown such great grace and for me (in my attitude) to show no grace is a debauchery.  

Grace doesn’t necessarily mean a person is free from being punished. Grace will influence the attitude in which it is carried out.

I believe Steve will be punished, I believe he should.  However, my heart is heavy for a person whom I once knew well and has thrown his life away over something that was surely not worth it.  I also know that God has taken thrown away lives and changed them for His glory and that is my hope.