...it took two hours…
…confirming that I am NOT (nor ever will be) a mechanic.
If I told you I was not frustrated last night, would you believe me?
Neither would I.
It is a season in life. I am ok with that, but I have felt that I was in a dry season spiritually. I understand that it is ok to have dry seasons in life. However, I had to wonder, when was it going to end? I found myself with some small pockets of free time here and there. When I found these pockets, all I wanted to do was to be a vegetable and relax. The problem is that I was feeling a longing, not guilt, but a longing to be in a place similar to where I was when I had some of my closer times with God.
I don’t want to go back to those times, but I want to be close again, but how do I do it when I am buried?
I began to search my schedule. I began trying to line up my priorities of God and family with what I was doing. Does the direction I am heading line up with the destination I am hoping for of being close to God, being a good husband, and being a good father (and numerous other things). From doing this I realized that things cannot remain this way forever. I understand that it is just a season, but I want to move forward, realizing that there will be bumps and hiccups due to the matters taking place in this season because I don’t want to set unachievable goals. Unachievable goals just frustrate me and make me less likely to continue and therefore, finish.
I started praying. In all honesty, it wasn’t a lot. It wasn’t some sit down, hour’s long, weeping, kneeling, and pensive prayer time. It was every time I thought about it. I was troubled about it (more than I probably should have been because I over think things). It came to me, I believe spoken to me, that there was a story in the Scripture that related to this.
In Matthew 25 there is a story of a wealthy man that gave bags of gold (talents) to some of his workers. Those who were the good workers took what was given them and made more. One of the workers buried the money and used the excuse that he was afraid to do much else with it because he didn’t want to lose the wealthy man’s money.
The story speaks of the sod of the earth as the thing that buries the gold, I began to wonder what is it that I allow to bury me in this life. What are the meaningless things, in the midst of the important things, that I allow to cover me over and not be useful? In some cases we will be busy with very important things. I wanted to be sure to address that possibility. In my case, in the midst of the important things, God began to reveal some things that I had in my schedule that had a higher priority than necessary.
This is not an exact science, it is a journey and one that we should try our best to enjoy. This journey is a gift. It is the treasure that God has given me to care for. I don’t want to bury it in dirt, or any other worthless thing. I want to invest it in things that will bring glory to God, show His love to my family, my friends, and really anyone I come in contact with. My Intentions may be great, but is the way I am living my life pointing me in the direction of that goal? Or do I continue to intend to do well, but nothing about my life changes.
Once again, this is not an exact science. However, it is an important matter (that I have found personally) if we want to be the people that accomplish the life that God has set for us. If we want to be the best parent we can, the best spouse, the disciple, the friend, co-worker or whatever.
Don’t get buried. Your life is a treasure and should be lived as such. Let the things of less worth go and chase after the important things that will add to this treasure that has been entrusted to your care.